A day full of perspective.
This morning I found out a man just a couple of years older than I am dropped dead of a heart attack.
Yeah, it happens all the time.
The thing that was challenging is that this man had two teenage kids.
The first and only time I ever met him was last Friday. We had some pleasant chit chat about kids…his and mine. We shook hands and both went on our way.
18 hours later he was dead. Out for a morning walk, and his heart just decided to quit.
A reminder that everything we do is precious. It can be taken away from us at any time.
I was chatting with another friend of mine about this. She has kids about the same age as mine. Same thing occurred to her. Everything is on loan, even as it’s from a benevolent universe who wants to have fun with the experience.
I stepped away for a few minutes so I could have a good cry. I get less shy about that kind of thing as I get older.
The whole life thing…it really is a gift. Whether we treasure it or squander it; whether we add value to the world around us, or are insignificant and even mean, we’re still going to have an end point.
And there are things we can do to prolong life. Certainly many more things we can do to make the time spent worthwhile.
So why the heck not?
Later that same day I was driving with my daughter, Sarah to her job. She has her learner’s permit and is just about ready for the test.
We were stopped at a red light behind a few other cars when
At least that’s what it felt like. A car behind us plowed into our rear bumper.
I felt the impact, but knew I wasn’t injured in the true sense of the word. I looked over at Sarah. Other than a startled scream, she was also OK.
That was about four hours ago. Both of us are pretty sore at the moment. This is gonna get worse before it gets better.
The other driver and I pulled into the Taco Bell parking lot up ahead. He was beside himself with regret.
And I’m sure he was waiting for a blast of anger hurled his way.
It didn’t come.
Maybe my experiences earlier in the day influenced my reaction. Maybe other events in my life that showed me to appreciate and love those precious people who can be taken from you any moment did the same thing.
I had no anger in my heart for this man. And I made sure he knew it. And so did Sarah. Even as the police completed the accident report.
Knowing that of all the different car accidents that could happen, this is among those we can easily live with. A cracked rear bumper can easily be repaired. A person you breathe with and into…not so much.
I don’t know what you have going on in your life right now.
I don’t know if you’re just on cruise control, passing the days.
I don’t know if you’re quietly desperate…or not so quietly. Or if you’re angry, scared, looking for someone or something to hold onto.
I don’t know if you’re in flow, on purpose and loving the experience.
I don’t know if you’re at peace with whatever is coming your way.
Wherever you are, take a moment to appreciate the fact that you’re here…and no matter what has or hasn’t happened, you get to squeeze a little more flavor out of this gift you’ve been given.
Have you had any experiences that have made you stop and appreciate?
Who or what are you grateful for?
Comment below and share. There are others who could use an adjustment.
I like to fantasize as much as the next guy.
That’s not true. I like to fantasize a lot more than most people I know.
So I just saw a question online… If you could live anywhere in the world, where would you choose?
You would think that would be easy and fun one to play with. But really, not as much as you think.
Here’s the thing…anywhere that you want to live means you have to be the person who matches the environment.
And as cool as it seems to detach from all the other things, my personal brand of fantasizing needs to have context to it.
So if I say I want to live in Key West, my next question will be where? Condo? Villa? Apartment? Mansion?
And then my brain will go to, how will I maintain the lifestyle folks have in Key West?
Which of course leads to who must they become to maintain that lifestyle? I just have a really hard time plopping myself down in the middle of an environment without the consciousness to be there.
Sure, it’s a bit of a buzz kill as far as indulging in the fantasy.
But at the same time it’s exactly the type of imagination that turns things from fantasy into reality.
And that really means what I don’t do is fantasize.
A fantasy allows you to detach from any possible reality. It’s a fragmented little dreamscape. It’s escapism.
And there’s nothing wrong with a little escapism. It’s a nice little stress reducer. It’s what folks do when they sit around the Thanksgiving table, dividing up their lottery winnings among the extended family.
It’s cool, so long as you don’t actually believe that’s how your life is going to turn out.
A vision is what an architect does. They play with a the big picture of something. But then they go about creating the infrastructure to make it happen. They make sure it’s on a firm foundation. And that there’s proper access to water, and electricity. And they make sure the proper permits are in place, so the structure is in line with the norms of everything else that’s around it.
Then they build it carefully, to last forever. Or at least as long as they plan on staying.
It reminds me of an early network marketing training I attended…this was twelve or so years ago. The trainer went around the room and had people say where they wanted to wind up in this particular company’s pay plan.
All of them, except for one said they wanted to be at the very top.
At the time, there were 15 people in the company, out of more than a million who were at this level.
The only one who didn’t? Yeah…that was me.
Not because I didn’t want to make a lot of money. I did.
And not because I didn’t think I could grow into the skills and consciousness that would create it.
I just wasn’t willing to make the two hundred percent commitment I knew it took to get to that level. I knew other things were a-callin’.
And yes, I also saw the road littered with the dead bodies of those who said they wanted it all.
But I digress. Back to the “if you could live anywhere” question…
Yes, you can live anywhere you want. There’s no such thing as can’t.
But having the awareness and consciousness to do it- and the habits – that’s another story.
Because the villa in France is populated with people who come from old money. It’s handed down from generation to generation.
And with people who crack the code…not only of creating a major leveraged income, but of taking on the consciousness to keep it.
They know how to manage that kind of fortune. They know how to staff their villa, and to hire the right people to supervise the staff. And the right accountants and auditors to make sure the people they hired are doing their jobs.
And they know enough about it themselves to ask the right questions and look for the right answers.
You get the idea.
Sorry…didn’t mean to rain on your parade.
If you could live anywhere in the world, how would you want to live?
Who would you want to be?
And then yeah…where would you do it?
So…if you could live anywhere, where would you want to live?
And what are you willing to grow into to make it happen?
Comment below. And share it around with your fellow dreamers!
There is some serious fall foliage falling fast!
In fact, it feels like Truth Bombs.
Fortunately, we have some great peeps who KaBOOMed us this week with some superb, sublime wisdom to keep up.
A Pattern Interrupt Truth Bomb from Col McGunnigle:
Sometimes a barrage of thought takes up so much of our awareness. This week I’m choosing to notice something beautiful at various moments throughout the day.
I want to softly interrupt that pattern with this intention … calm, clear, peaceful mind.
A Commitment Truth Bomb from Freddy Melero:
I will act now. I will act now. I will act now. Henceforth, I will repeat these words each hour, each day, everyday, until the words become as much a habit as my breathing, and the action which follows becomes as instinctive as the blinking of my eyelids. With these words I can condition my mind to perform every action necessary for my success. I will act now. I will repeat these words again and again and again. I will walk where failures fear to walk. I will work when failures seek rest. I will act now for now is all I have.
Tomorrow is the day reserved for the labor of the lazy. I am not lazy. Tomorrow is the day when the failure will succeed. I am not a failure. I will act now.
Success will not wait. If I delay, success will become wed to another and lost to me forever. This is the time.
This is the place. I am the person.
A Health Truth Bomb from Amparo Pagan Titmus:
Saturday night is not a reason to derail from all your efforts during the week.
A Grace Truth Bomb from Lena Bjorna:
You know what’s one of my favorite words in the English language?
Because none of us have it all figured out. We’re all a work in progress. We mess up. We break promises. We fail each other. And so we constantly need to give and get grace.
It’s been said that “grace is the face love wears when it meets imperfection…”
Grace does away with bitterness and unforgiveness, and gives hope where there otherwise would be none.
“Grace”…small word, huge concept. Because grace holds the power to change everything…
A No More Excuses Truth Bomb from Kellie Kuecha:
Stop the need to always explain why you can or can’t do something. We do this out of shame and guilt. If you can, great and if you can’t great too. Leave the stories behind.
No and yes are complete sentences. Be secure enough in your choices not to seek acceptance or validation.
You choice is yours and is good enough. Peace.
And Finally an Adversity Truth Bomb from Aron Parker:
When you are going through a PROBLEM… let it bring you CLARITY so you find the solution quickly! Trials and Tribulations will make you STRONGER if you allow them!! Get CLEAR and FOCUSED about what’s really important in your life and things will start change for the better very fast!
If you keep doing what you have always done, you will keep getting what you have always got! Remember… for things to change YOU must change! READY?
Which of these Truth Bombs KABOOMED you the hardest?
Got any of your own add?
Comment below and share. The world is waiting!
I am in the weirdest state!
Maybe I’m not the only one to do something like this. Maybe it just feels that way…
For the last two days I’ve lost my keys. I’d come home, do my usual thing, then need to go out somewhere.
I’d look for the keys in all the usual spots…starting with the hook I automatically hang them on when I come home.
Then I’d retrace my steps. And look in the usual spots…including where I keep my wallet and cell phone charger.
The first day I grabbed the keys to one of the other cars and when about my business.
Today I was all set to do the same, to pick up my daughter after her college class. Same problem…no keys.
Only this time, right before I was set to use the spare key, I looked where I eventually found them yesterday.
There they were…
In the ignition of my car.
Apparently they never made it out either day after I came home.
Doesn’t seem like that big a deal, does it? I mean, it’s the kind of thing everyone does from time to time, right along with leaving the house key in the front door.
Thing is…when I came home yesterday, I was the only one there, and I remember the door being locked, or at least I think I do.
And that means the keys had to have come out of the car so I could get in the house.
That had me scratching my head a bit. Never did figure that one out.
Today, before I left to get Sarah it occurred to me to look in the ignition. Yup…there they were.
It reminded me of a very strange thing that happened when I was in third grade. I used to wear undershirts under my regular shirt. Just a matter of course.
(This is one of those embarrassing moments I only share with my pals on this blog.)
One day my father had me take off my undershirt. I don’t know why. Maybe it was because it was time to do a load of laundry. I took it off…
And there was another one underneath it. Apparently I had forgotten to take one off before I put the other on.
It was one of those moments that was so bizarre, there was no other choice but to laugh. So we did.
Then I took the second one off.
Yup…there was a third.
It got to that Twilight Zone moment.
And it was one of those pivotal moments in the father and son relationship. Dad could have ruined me with yelling at my sloppiness, or bad hygiene. Hey, if I had three undershirts on, that tells you how many days it had been since Larry had a shower.
Or he could have laughed along with me.
Good pal that he was – and still is – we had a good laugh over it.
And that was the last time I had duplicate undershirts.
So, bringing it back to present day…
We all have our own forms of bad habits, or weirdness. I just laid out one of mine.
And there are a bunch of ways to break them.
My favorite one is to detach from the usual emotional response to them.
I could have been mortified when I peeled off layer after layer of undershirt. Instead I found safety and humor.
I could have beaten myself up for whatever short circuit in my brain caused me to keep leaving the keys in the car (and might do the same thing again tomorrow).
Instead, I pivoted to my anchor behavior, which made me feel instantly good, and changed the environment in which I operate.
Will I purge the bad habit? Maybe. I’m sure I have a better chance than if I let my frustration and anxiety keep building.
What about you?
Got any habits of your own you’d like to get rid of…strange or otherwise?
How has humor and “chilling out” worked?
Any suggestions of your own?
Comment below and share! Someone is waiting for your help!