Memorial Day Message: Honor and Civility
Hi All,
CLICK HERE for the audio I recorded for Memorial Day, 2009…
Six minutes about your responsibility to live big, and to honor those who died for your liberty to treat it with respect.
That’s the 2009 version, and I’m going to stick my two cents in right here with the 2010 message…
I’m looking at the blogs, and listening to the conversations around me. The absolute disrespect we are hurling at our political leaders, and those who disagree with us…it amazes me.
It is a dishonor to those who gave our lives so we can have liberty.
Look, I understand what happens when you have a computer and the ability to speak your mind without having to interact directly with those who can read your words.
We allow our anger and our frustration to boil over. We participate in a free-for-all of hostility and hatred. The consequences for that kind of hate speech are minimal.
Or are they?
The fabric of our society is our CIVILITY. To disagree with the positions of our elected officials while honoring them as people and the process that allowed them to become elected in the first place.
It’s the same process that allows them to be voted out of office.
When we write and say things out of hatred – when we make it personal – we tear at the fabric our society was built upon.
We stop hearing each other. We make it easy to make decisions by listening to the voices of intolerance, bigotry and narrow self-interest.
Simply put, we become dumber.
And this is no time to be dumb. We need the best minds. We need an informed electorate now more than any other time.
Calling each other names plays into the hands of those who wish us ill.
It also happens to be a favorite tactic of those who kill and blow themselves up because someone’s religion or skin color is different.
It’s Memorial Day weekend. Honor those who gave their lives for your liberty.
Discuss. Debate. Disagree.
Organize. Make sure your elected officials know what you want, and why you want it.
Work to vote your favorites in and vote the ones you disagree with out.
And honor the sacrifice of our veterans by cherishing the values that a prosperous society needs to stay prosperous.
Your Friend,
Larry Hochman
Coloring Your Confidence (and Compassion)
“I thought we were going to color with the little kids. I don’t want to do this.”
So said a 16 year old girl. And the adventure begins!
It had been an interesting experience. Each year our local United Way chapter has something called a Day of Caring. Community folks do volunteer work at different nonprofit organizations. I wound up being the team supervisor for a group of high school students who were dispatched to a local horse farm where they practice therapeutic riding for kids with autism.
None of us knew where our placements were beforehand. This was my first year. Apparently this young lady had done work at a local United Way affiliated daycare center last year, and thus was ready to color with the kids all over again.
When we got to Shepard Meadows we knew it would be a different story.
Another group of volunteers were already at work painting a barn. We soon found out our job was to paint a newly built fence. Brushes, gloves and little buckets were waiting for us, as well as a giant bucket of white paint. Ten of us filled up our little buckets and went to work.
As we painted I couldn’t help but smile to myself. The young lady who wanted to color actually got her wish. Only instead of using crayons to color with kids she was using paint to color a giant fence. A slightly different kind of coloring. Turns out she got nearly as much paint on herself as she did the fence.
But she was a trooper! Actually, all the kids were. They painted away in the hot sun, barely taking a break. It turns out the staff at the farm thought we’d only get about half the fence done in the three or so hours we worked. We got nearly the whole thing done, and ran out of paint. What a crew!
And whether she knew it or not, my little friend was probably doing more good than if she had helped one youngster with coloring pictures. Because of her and the rest of the team, many kids who have a hard time communicating any other way are going to ride horses. They will learn confidence, communication on a deeper level, even love.
When we finished, all the kids were tired but happy. They felt the sense of accomplishment. My little friend complained about the paint that had ruined her t shirt and shorts. But there was a gleam in her eye and a little smile on her lips.
*** ***
We all have talents and skills. We’re all gifted. Most of us only allow our skills to come out when we’re in our comfort zone.
We can color anywhere. We can build anywhere. We can communicate anywhere.
And we can love anywhere.
Working – and playing – in a different environment than our usual one gives us a chance to grow. It shows us how capable we are.
And it gives us a chance to serve those around us.
What can you do today that will help you expand? What abilities do you have that, put to different use, will challenge you, make you bigger, stronger, more complete and more amazing than you already are?
Who is waiting for you to step up, step out and “color in” their world?
Your Friend,
Larry
P.S. Take a look at Shepard Meadows. If you have a therapeutic riding center near you, it’s worth your support. If not, feel free to support this magnificent place in Connecticut!
The God Squad
Thinking back to the mid 1980’s when I was in college. We had a group of guys who lived in the suite next door to us. They were born again Christians.
Great guys. They played guitar. They were lots of fun to be around. You never had to worry about whether your room was locked when they were around.
We called them “The God Squad.”
It’s kind of funny when you look back on it. Besides the cool name these guys got, you really wouldn’t have noticed too many differences. The main ones: the prayed before eating, never swore and never threw up in the bathroom sink.
If you looked closer you also saw another difference. They had an air of serenity that most of the rest of us didn’t. We always seemed to worry about stuff – grades, girlfriends, lack of girlfriends, cars, etc.
The God Squad were always in a good mood. They seemed more self-assured than the rest of us. At least this particular group of guys did.
There were others around – the ones who got in your face and asked if you’d been saved. Some of them seemed to look down on those who didn’t hold the same beliefs as the others.
Even then I could tell those guys radiated negative energy and usually repulsed the very people they were trying to attract.
The God Squad would just be. If you asked a question, they’d answer. They may even invite you to whatever place of worship they attended. But it always seemed like an invitation, not an ultimatum.
I admired The God Squad for their willingness to do what felt right, and the ease with which they did it. Unlike the other more aggressive born again Christians, no one made fun of the God Squad. They were among the most respected group of people in the residence hall.
Not surprisingly (looking back on it) they also seemed to have the most attractive girlfriends, although not necessarily what we thought of as the “hotties” at the time.
With twenty something years of hindsight and some good life experiences, I now know The God Squad were really just some of the early practicioners of the Law Of Attraction.
They used Christianity and the Bible as their frame of reference, and they focused on the parts that preach love, inclusion and acceptance of all people as God’s children.
I’m glad the God Squad were around then. They were great role models for me and others, not necessarily in what to do, but in how to be yourself. Saying very little, they actually said a lot.
For all you current God Squadders, keep up the good work. Be yourselves, and invite others into your experience. The right ones will show – ready, willing and able.
Your Pal,
Larry
Get the free CRASH COURSE IN CREATION and keep up with all the goings on. Visit me at NO MORE HOLDING BACK.
First Post: Let The Wild Things Be Wild
4:00 pm on a gorgeous Thursday afternoon. About 70 degrees out. Perfect time to mow the lawn. I’ve been getting grief from Jill, my 16 year old about the length of it, and our usual lawn mowing kid hasn’t started the season yet.
So I gas up, check the oil, and get into it.
The front lawn looked like a beautiful, lush meadow. The grass was ten days tall and wildflowers were everywhere. The center island had its flowering bushes in full bloom and the dogwood tree was incredible.
But of course conditioning kicked in. No one wants to have the only house in the neighborhood with the overgrown lawn. So I started in on the front yard.
There were two patches that had the most beautiful purple wildflowers. They come around every year about this time. They last three or four weeks, then die off.
That is, they last unless they get mowed over along with the rest of the grass.
Each year I watch the bees come by and pollenate these wildflowers. Sure, there are plenty of other flowers for the bees. Lilacs are also in full bloom right now, not to mention thousands of other varieties.
But these are my flowers. They’re on my lawn.
It was an easy choice. As carefully as I could, I mowed around the patches of wildflowers. I even cut into them slightly where there was an opening. I tilted the lawnmower up in certain places to get to patches of grass in the middle the flowers.
I treated them with the TLC that something wild and beautiful deserves.
And I looked back at my work when I was finished. A very nice, neat, “proper” front yard. Fits in nicely with the rest of the neighborhood. There’s something to be said for order; compliance to the standards of those around you…when you aren’t compromising your own principles.
And I looked at the brilliant bursts of purple. No doubt some of the neighbors won’t be in love with the “weeds” I left in the yard. No one else in the neighborhood seems to have those blooms on their lawn.
But the processes of nature, the way we allow the natural world to flourish around us…for me it was more important than falling in line.
I’ll take the annoyance of a few folks. To see something express its beauty and its purpose, and to play a role in allowing it to unfold…it’s magic.
*** ***
We have people in our lives who are those purple flowers. They don’t do things the way the rest of us do. They don’t stay in line. They upset what we think is the proper balance of things.
But they bloom so beautifully.
And they feed a process we may not see, but is more important than any simple conformity.
Yeah, you can cut them out of your yard. You can wall yourself off from their wild, uninhibited nature.
Or you can delight in the God force they have to express.
And you can get swept up in it and become a “wild thing” yourself.
I know what my choice is.
Naturally Yours,
Larry