I had just finished a challenging set of pull-ups on my Saturday work out.
I did, well…a lot of them. Didn’t think much of it because it’s what I do. It’s what I’ve been doing for years.
I took my usual 72 second break between sets. (Yeah, I’m kinda regimented that way.)
On my way to the water fountain I heard him…
Awesome Job, Brother.
It was that guy. He was around 18, and in elite physical shape for any age.
That’s him, at the top of this post. Not a stock photo. The real dude!
See, he represents the guy I permitted myself to feel inferior to you throughout my youth.
He’s the guy I felt was bullying me, judging me, taking my stuff.
Turns out he wasn’t doing any of that. It was 90% inside my own head.
And of course ten percent of it was real. It was a few people needing to feel bigger by making someone else feel smaller. That’s the human condition. I’ve done it. So have you. It’ll always be there.
The question is… How much do you want to be a slave to it?
How responsive do you want to be to needing approval from other people? To worrying about what they’ll think of you?
This very cool young man was complimenting me for banging out a whole bunch of pull up that most men my age just don’t do. I think he was also complimenting the fact that my form was perfect. Slow, full range of motion, proper breathing.
And then we did the fist bump!
See, I liberated myself from worrying about what the big guys stop years ago. Some would argue I am one of those big guys now.
I don’t see it. Or more accurately I do see myself as one of those big guys. In fact I know I am.
But that has nothing to do with comparisons to anyone else. That’s all me. My skills, my work ethic, my worthiness.
And yes, I’ve achieved some pretty cool results.
That’s available to everyone. Yes, you too.
So when one of the big guys, or cool guys, or beautiful people – whatever you want to call them – interact with me, it’s fun.
I feel like I belong with them. I am one of them.
I had been the whole time. Just took a while to put away the narrative I had that said I wasn’t good enough to be one.
(The Guru Code people know all about that!)
And I had to replace with with seeing myself as someone bigger than I had been living.
And for a while, getting away from blaming anyone for my position in life besides myself.
And then not blaming myself anymore…replacing anger with forgiveness and love…toward myself.
And freeing up the space to work my ass for what I wanted.
And also letting it come to me…gently and gracefully.
So that when someone looks up to me as a “Big Guy,” I can see the Big Guy in them as well…male or female.
And contribute a little to the process that lets their own Big Guy come out.
What have you let go of that was holding you back from becoming the Awesome Person that’s already inside you?
What are you still holding onto?
What’s your plan for getting rid of it?
Comment and share! People are looking to you for leadership.