As a professional counselor and coach since 1990, one of the most common challenges people come to me with is how to have more confidence in their business and personal lives.
Of course the ways to get more confident really depend on the circumstances of the person. But there are three ways that almost everyone isn’t doing enough of…and when they do, things will start falling into place…
1.Honor Your Commitments
Let’s start with something simple. Make any commitment, and follow through on it.
Many of us struggle with believing our own words. We’ve failed to follow through on so many of the things we said we would do. So when we tell ourselves, “this time I’m really gonna do it,” another voice follows up with, “yeah…sure you will!”
Decide on one thing you will do, no matter what. Make it simple enough so that it’s very unlikely anything will prevent you from doing it.
And then no matter what, (I mean no matter what) accomplish that one thing. Let that trust in your own word be your new calling card. Then you can start committing to other things with cleaner, more straightforward energy.
2. Set And Reach One Attainable Goal
Many people, especially in the home business industry are surrounded by role models who have achieved some incredible things. It’s easy to watch the “guru” walk across the stage and pick up a giant check, new car keys or a fancy lapel pin.
Each one of those people had the same level of skill you do now, or less.
And each of them grew their skills and their confidence step by step. They might have used the “big guys” as role models of what is possible. But they didn’t allow themselves to get blinded by the light.
Find one goal…something that is slightly outside what you can do at this moment and is within something you can control. Don’t make it something that is too dependent on the actions of other people. That comes later, when your influence is bigger than it is today.
Once you set that goal, your confidence in your ability to reach other goals will naturally start to increase.
3. Edify Someone Else
Many of us have a hard time saying nice things about ourselves. Part of that is we’ve been taught not to “brag.” But there’s a big difference between arrogance and confidence.
At the same time, many of us have an easier time pointing that praise outward. It’s often much easier to find the good qualities in other than in ourselves.
Make it a habit to publicly say something nice about at least one person a day. You can say it to them, or put it on their social media, or even say it about them to another person.
Doing this does two good things. It starts a process of getting out of your own head, your own ego. You stop being so self conscious, because you aren’t thinking about you.
It also makes people much more likely to return the favor. Not because they feel like they have to. But because your generosity and graciousness makes them feel like they want to.
Building self confidence is a pretty involved process, and there are some great resources to grow in this area. Once you feel ready, capable and worthy of success, the marketplace has a great way of helping you get there.
What are some of the ways you have built your own confidence? Where do you still have room to grow?
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